So

I'm going to write here for me.  I'm not writing here "for readers" I want viewers for my photography, because that strokes my ego.  I'm not a blogger out looking for recognition. I'm not writing to go to a Blogger Convention to meet other people who write. I don't understand that mentality that because you write on a webpage you have to meet with other people who write.   

I want to write more about my Marriage issues and problems and things that lead up to such trauma as filing for divorce.  Maybe about what it is like to be in your 30s struggling to identify yourself.   I think, identity goes into so many of my issues.   While I know we're all insignificant in the end, some of us desire that recognition more than others.  I am one of them.  Maybe its because I had an awful time in Junior High and High School was tolerable but not comfortable.  Maybe its because sometimes I still feel like the most awkward, ugly person in the room when I walk into a group of people.   Sometimes...I feel like I've defined myself by being married since I was 18, and it was that fear that I was missing something that could be better.  SO many fears.   

This fall has been terrifying.   It began a week after school started.   I over-reacted to something that happened but I was already overwhelmed... I am surprised I've kept up in my classes with everything that has happened.  

I want to be trusted